On top of the world
by hellish dusk
Summary: Cameron spends time hanging out with John and discuss happy times and Sarah. John and Cameron contemplate why their writer makes them speak like retards. Maybe certain writers should stop writing like this and take a hint.
1. On top of the world

"Cameron you must tell me why you are smiling." Inquired John Connor sitting on the moon with Cameron Baum Phillips and with the fairys. "I am smiling because I am pregnant with Sarah's babys after our sixsome with me, you, Allison Young, Uncle Derek, Sarah and your bastard son Cromartie" Cameron replied. "But you must say why it is that you are pregnant with my mother's baby" John responded. "John, Sarah is a hermaphrodite with a penos." Cameron laughed joyously. "Oh that is good that you are carrying my mother's baby inside you." John responded. "Yes and it is good that we are on the moon too. I am on the top of the world with this beautiful news today."


	2. THE HAND OF HAPPY

"John why are we talk like this?" said Cameron askingly. "Are we talk bad?" John said. "Yes John we talk like we are mentally ill and we talk crap that is pointless and sometimes that is sick and that is twisted." Cameron said. John laughed and Cameron Baum Phillips brushed her blonde hair with her favorite sparklee brush that is pink "You are worry too much like a firecracker in the brain." Joked John. "I know that I have worry a lot since you went for the sex change operation but we need to stop talking like this because it is making me sick and out of breath because there are no full stops in my speech anymore" Cameron cried. John took a gun and shot Cameron in the head and shot himself on the head to stop me writing. I cried because I wanted to write some more tampon jokes and insest but my favorite people are now dead. I must stop writing now and go to bed because my mom tells me to go to bed.


	3. Reality Check

Sarah awoke with a start, her knuckles white from gripping the bed sheets too tightly. They were soaked with sweat and she was breathing heavily. Slowly, the room began to come back into focus and the sordid nightmares were replaced by familiar surroundings. As she sat up, she heard the sound of footsteps entering her room.

"Mom! Mom! You okay? You were screaming." John rushed through the door, his face filled with concern.

"John... I had the worst dream...!" She buried her head in her hands, in an attempt to hide the tears welling up her eyes. He sat on the edge of the bed, leaned across and put an arm around her shoulder.

"Judgment day again? The one where you're caught in the nuclear explosion?"

"No. Much much worse: we were all characters in a creepy story. It was so... sick! You were there.. so was Cameron.. and Derek. But it wasn't you - everyone was talking garbage and doing weird.. stuff."

Sarah gagged as she recalled the memories. She threw off the covers and rushed to the bathroom, where she was violently sick. John stood at the door, attempting to show some sign of sympathy; although he was quite unable to comprehend just how horrific the nightmare had been.

Suddenly there was a knock at the front door. Sarah gestured for John to stay out of sight as she crept down the stairs. Through the glass, there was no mistaking the blurry silhouette of Cromartie.

"Run!!" She screamed, as the door bent inwards, smashed off its hinges by a well placed kick. In the haste to get back to her son, she stumbled, tripped on the third step of the staircase and tumbled to the floor. She felt for the glock, but it was missing. Cromartie looked down at the apparently helpless woman and tilted his head inquisitively. His dry lips parted to utter a single word, which filled her heart with unimaginable terror.

"Grandmother?"

Above her, Cameron stepped out of John's room and peered over the railing. Judging from her bump, she appeared to be in the late stages of pregnancy. Her hair was blonde and there were tears running down her face. Sarah's lower lip began trembling with panic.

"Sarah you need to sit down because we have bad news to tell you which is bad."

John, minus his pants, stepped out from behind her. His oddly gormless face also streaked with tears.

"Farrah Fawcett is dead..." He uttered in a quivering voice.

'Cameron' collapsed to her knees and began crying uncontrollably. From the sound of sobbing, 'Cromartie' appeared to be in a similar state; she slowly turned towards him, fearful of what she might see. Her fears were justified - Cromartie was wearing a leopard print thong.

"This is so terrible the whole world is coming to an end I can't believe that my favorite actress is dead!" He bawled.

There was a moment's silence, then Sarah opened her mouth and screamed.


End file.
